A valentine has never been so confusing.

Alright i know I've been outta the game for 4 years and didn't even have game before those four years but fuck.
I'm confused as mother fucker.

As i awkwardly left the car on valentine night, i asked her for her number and i punched it in. Nerves usually get the best of me, and that's not to hard considering when I'm 99.9% nerves. I called her and honestly cant remember what happened but told her to text me. She was supposed to have gotten the call. and then put it in her phone.

Dialogue:
hey you got my number right..!? I remember calling.. but i don't know if you got it lol

I didnt but now i do lol

Awesome sorry! yeah idk. I thought it went through or something and uh yeah lol i guess i blacked out or something.

Drunk bitch! Blacking out everywhere ...

Lol well maybe I like to blackout sometimes did you ever think of that?

I didnt but dont rely on me to carry yo uaround

Not even a little? Fine I'll just choke to death on my own tongue when I lay back

And than I'll definitely come back and haunt you if you didn't end up telling me when you were free this week

Ok i'll try to turn you on your stomach

Perfect!

Can you really choke on your tongue

Hah yeah it's the number one cause of airway obstruction after surgery

So I can go to sleep tonight and choke on my tongue

Be very afraid
Lol yeah idk I guess you can never thought of that.

(off timing) Is that a threat
Well if i don't wake up tomorrow you know why

Hahah alright I think your odds are good though seem to have made it this far
I have a question! did you ever see Spartacus on stars?

Distaste

(off timing) True true
I dont know what your talking about but i like the sound of it

Lol.. it's a show about gladiators in Rome and it's just constant awesome for an hour straight but
I was hoping you knew cause I was arguing with Staten and she was saying all this crazy shit about what
happened and bet me 20 bucks that some guy died

No never heard of it but some guy does die

Bullshit!

I swear!

Cereal or toaster strudel?

What kind of cereal

Grr supposed to be lucky charms but someone at it and also stole my tony flakes

So maybeee frosted flakes

Starve
Yeah

What I'm skinny as shit already I can't starve
I'll eat an old can of expired beans behind the fridge before I'll let myself starve

Cereal it is!
Ew lol

Lol awesome oh and let me know if i'm keeping you up! I probably won't stop talking
if you keep txting

So far so good

So tell me something awesome
Wait!
Actually I'll tell you a story that's pretty crazy and then you have to come up with something in response
and it has to be true
K? lol

I've been thinking about punching myself in the face for everytime i said "lol" in this conversation
Doesnt have to be now but whenever

Ok. Hows the cereal

Rediculously delicious

Wow i didn't get half your texts til just now

Shit sorry yeah service in my room is like a blackhole for signal

Haha how about that story

Kk

So there's these chain of islands off of japan where there was several volcanic eruptions for decades and eventually it turned the air into mostly sulfur and is completely poisonous and uninhabitable. Until some crazy Japanese people decided to live there after being paid for scientific research. They lived wearing gas masks most their lives and worked somehow ate and slept.

A four year old could put a sentence far better than I ever could.
Lol and yeah was gonna send a better one.. I wrote it all out but realized it was actually super morbid and didn't want you to think i was creepy or whatever.

Happily ever after. Did you just make that up?

Nope it's all true

Its cool your creepy or something anyway

Aw what? lol
it's called mijakejima island or islands
google it punk
I think it's like habitable today though

Muahaha
I like the sound of that
Maybe ill go there and itll be my new not so natural habitat

I'm starting to think she's a little more weirder than i originally thought.

Lol interesting
So got a story!?

Nothing can beat that...

I'm sure theres something crazy out there you can tell me
You agreed to it so you have to

!

There are tiny people living in every pillow case. At night they sneak in your ear and go into your dreams to keep monsters away. But sometimes they get tired or sick from keeping away the monsters and hafta take a rest. So sometimes the monsters do you get ya :(

Lol well that explains why i get nightmares just punched myself in the face when i wear my earmuffs to sleep but! i still want a true story
Like I said doesnt have to be now!

God why the fuck am i so fucking happy sounding.

Ok did you know hitler had a pee fetish? When he has sex he wants his gf to pee on him

Haha what the f? and I was worried i'd be creepy
Lol is that true?
Ah txts stopped sending

Hahahaha
Yep
Yeah i got like 2 million of each text

Yeah sorry my friend always yells at me cause of that i think i mentioned how my phone sucks shit. Least you'll know its me because you'll hear a thousand text messages

Hahahaha i thought i wasnt responding fast enough lol

Haha no my phone just has tourettes or something

Lol make sure you turn it on its stomach so it doesn't choke on its tongue

Will do lol that was definitely a crazy story though ill tell you the one I had originally when I see you
So what you doing up this late may i ask?

Otay

Nothing kinda just laying here lol

Lol if you want to sleep say so I gotta soon gotta wake up 9 to get my ass back to college

Soon to*

"TOO" YOU FUCK!

Same I guess ill jus talk tomorrow

Guess? Well I guess i'll answer lol alright gnight
Oh and don't forget to try not to cover your ears don't want monsters coming into your dreams

Confidence strong, little bit confused but good after endgame reviewed.

3:27 PM

Me, What are you doing tomorrow?


5:26 PM
Working all day :(

I didnt get that pillow case text til this morning thanks for the warning

9:01 PM
Bummer alright sorry for super long wait was in class

Its cool i was too before

Heres where I wish I continued speaking, but decided to try and play hard to get/less desperate
10:38 PM
Sleeping!?
10:41 PM
I'll take that as a yes
Pause. See that sharp object? yeah it's coming for you. Anddd
Not anymore
Boom. Stagger to your feet and recover
You sleep to early lol alright
Night

I said stagger not grab the closest object and smash your face into it.
I feel like the entire situation started off on the wrong foot. A foot I never thought I had, after i woke up after being comatose for 3 decades, that lost all circulation from the weird angle it was laying in. I'll need to write out the why I should be jamming this in event in a far dark place in my mind and why I shouldn't give a shit.