I haven't smoked weed in 5 days, I haven't masturbated in 3. I feel different and happier. But right now im a little low.
I always feel like shit when a pretty girl comes around. I feel defeated when they leave. I feel like a failure knowing I wasn't so amazing that they just threw themselves at me. I don't know why the fuck my brain works like that. I don't.
I miss Ember. We haven't been able to hold a real conversation in over 2 weeks now. It makes me scared that I might not know her anymore when she comes up to me.
Im afraid.
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