Ember messaged me back after she disappeared. It makes sense that once everything has burnt up that it'd leave small coals glistening red hot. She told me she loves me.
God I'm so fucking weak. This girl, she's too fucking much for me. I think it wouldn't work out between us but every time she tells me she loves me or calls out to me I buckle and give in. I know I shouldn't. There's nothing that can come of us. She won't come up to new jersey, and I won't go down to florida. All of her friends I'm sure are party goers. I'm sure they love clubs. I'm sure they spend every night drunk. I'm a nerd. Id rather spend my time with just me and my lover. I don't need clubs. I don't need drinks. I don't need to get fucked up. I don't need to run out to the fancy city every Friday night. I don't need the anxiety of people. I don't need any of that.
A message between us. She accepted my friend request
ReplyDeleteEmber: Do I know you?
Eve: Hi I'm Eve.
I'm a really close friend of Dave's although now I don't live in the state of Nj anymore. We still correspond through text, computer and phone. He was telling me how excited he was that he had a new gf. I told him I couldn't wait to meet you.... I'm not sure what happened. Nobody is mad but I know for one thing Dave is sad and confused. I know that he had sincere feelings for you and he's a good guy, one of the best you could ever find. Do you think you could please talk to him...? Let him know that you're okay and where things stand between you two. Otherwise, he's stumbling in the dark waiting for you, wondering if you'll ever return his feelings. He misses you, I hope somewhere in your heart you miss him too.
( No response )
-----------------------------------
“Immature love says: 'I love you because I need you.'
Mature love says: 'I need you because I love you'” Erich Fromm