New years

Can't drink.

Heather bailed on us for having a place to drink. Were a group of twelve and now we've no where to go. Now I have to stay sober on new years while everyone gets shitty. 

I can't risk driving, I'm so close to having my record clean

Killing for a reason to live.

can't live for myself.
by myself.
everything is a sickness.
a sore throat hurting when eating.
the constant need to stay warm
yet always sweating.
gratification lasts only moments
and is regret seconds after.

Every one loves power.
Control of an entire life with nothing to lose.

I need therapy.

But I need money.

I need sex.

But I need dignity.